[War] Canada: "The Election"

[Michael Downey]

"The Election"
Prime Minister R. Leon MacIntyre
Canada
7 March 2013
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

MacIntyre just wanted to have a smoke and drink a bottle of beer. He
didn't want to go in front of a screaming crowed, or give some
long-ass speech to the networks, or shake the hands of every single
Liberal MP who had gotten a seat. The newly-elected Prime Minister of
Canada just wanted to light up a Medallion and down a bottle of Black
Horse.

"I just got us a majority, you couldn't leave me alone for five
fucking minutes?" MacIntyre mumbled to Felipe Dechard, the new
Government House Leader as they smiled and waved to the massive crowed
in the convention center.

"We're getting close to the podium Leon," warned Dechard. "The
microphones might pick you up."

Out of the 308 ridings the Liberals had fought for in the election,
which happened to be all of them, MacIntyre had visited 256. He'd done
the most visible and arduous campaign in any federal election. He was
tired, he was cranky, and that little Quebecois prick Dechard wouldn't
even let him have a fucking cigarette.

"I thought I was calling the shots now, being prime minister and all.
Guess someone forgot to send me a memo or something."

MacIntyre took his place at the podium. A dozen different microphones
from different networks stared him in the face, along with about
thirty-thousand people.

"Well, we've come a long way, haven't we?" began the PM. Silence
rushed over the crowed "It's been a hard fought campaign. Lots of
mudslinging, name-calling. Were there any scandals, Phil?" He turned
his head towards Dechard, who was standing in the background. The
House Leader just shrugged. "Well, I'm sure there were some. Just
keeping watching CBC, they'll figure it out."

That got a laugh out of the crowed. MacIntyre liked to be relaxed and
informal when giving speeches, not all fire and arm-thrusting like
lots of other politicians. He never yelled or got out of hand. His
style of speaking was very soft and conversational, like he was
addressing each person in the crowed individually and on a personal
level.

"In all seriousness, I think that this victory has given us a very
important mandate. I promised that when I was elected, I would
reinvigorate Canada. Promote industry, promote the environment, and
bring us back as an important mediator within the international
community. Well, that's exactly what I intend to do. It won't be easy,
it won't be fast. There's going to be a lot of fights, both home an
abroad. A lot of hard work is going to have to be put into a lot of
different issues. But this government has the will and the strength to
do it, especially with the loyalty and help of its supporters."

The crowed cheered loudly. MacIntyre allowed himself a deep grin. He
hadn't felt this good since he was elected premier of Nova Scotia, all
those years back. Now he was leader of the entire country.

Not a bad day.
---

It was easily 2:00 AM before he had gotten home. Sussex Drive was
being renovated so MacIntyre would still be living at his own Ottawa
estate for the time being. Tired from all the speeches and photos and
all that other crap, he'd gone down into his study and watched his
tape of the Canadians vs. Senators game.

"Congratulations," said a voice from the open doorway. MacIntyre
looked away from the wall-mounted LCD to see his son standing there.

"Oh, I'm surprised you're still up," said MacIntyre. "What were you
doing tonight?"

"Playing Xbox, chatting with friends, the usual," answered Jerome. "I
saw you on the news this evening. I guess you won."

"A hundred and sixty-five seats." MacIntyre nodded over at the
minifridge. "Go ahead, grab yourself a beer."

"You do realize that I can't drink for another year legally, right Dad?"

"Okay, don't," shrugged MacIntyre, sipping on his own Black Horse.
Jerome considered it and went for the fridge, then seating himself in
the chair in front of his father's desk. He fumbled with the cap for a
moment before MacIntyre grasped the bottle and used the much-worn edge
of the desk to pop it of for him.

"Should I start packing?" asked Jerome as they watched the hockey
game. MacIntyre shook his head.

"Nah, not for another few months. They still have to renovate Sussex
Drive. I bet the only good thing Harper has gotten out of all this is
that he gets to move back to Stornoway. If he stays on as Leader of
the Opposition, that is."

Jerome nodded. He did not have a particular interest in politics, but
did have a good understanding of it.

"I saw mom on TV."

"Did you?" asked MacIntyre. Odd for Jermone to bring up his mother.
"What did she say?"

"Nothing," answered Jermone. "Just that she was happy for the Liberal
Party and thought it was good that there was such a high voter
turnout."

"Your mother is not a bad person, Jerome," cautioned MacIntyre. "She
doesn't want to make some big public spectacle anymore than I do. She
values her privacy and she doesn't want to drag you or Mira into some
sort of messy news scandal. The separation was hard on all of us, and
neither I or your mom want it to get any harder."

"If she's not a bad person, why is it that she wouldn't give you
custody if Mira?"

The PM sighed. Divorce was always harder on the children than it was
the parents. "Because I was already planning to run for prime minister
when we broke up, and this is a job that takes up a lot of time. Now
you are much older and much more mature and can deal with the fact
that I'm not going to be around as much as I used to. Your sister is
just six, she won't understand that and she needs a lot more attention
than I can provide right now. It wouldn't be /fair/ to Mira to live
with me because I couldn't care for her properly."

"I guess," shrugged Jerome. He sipped on his beer.

"You're not drinking that properly," observed his father. "You don't
put your entire mouth over the opening, that gives you a lot of foam.
Just put your lip over the lower half."

"Right," answered the teenage, following the advice.

"Yeah, see, it doesn't foam up as much."

"So, can I have a smoke?"

"You can," said MacIntyre. "If you want me to drop you in the Arctic Ocean."

"You get to smoke."

"I'm the prime minister," explained MacIntyre with a smug grin,
spreading his hands. "I get to do a lot of things. Boss around
parliament, dance with the queen. It's a fun job, you should run for
office some day."
---

"I trust no one got too drunk last night?" It was the next morning and
MacIntyre had just sat down with his new cabinet. The comment elicited
a few chuckles. The PM tried to avoid scowling at his cabinet. So few
of them had a good sense of humor. That, after all, was what made a
good politician.

"To begin with, you are all aware that I have avoided appointing a
Minister of International Trade, a Minister of International
Cooperation and a Minister of National Revenue. My reasoning for doing
this is that I will be dissolving the associated departments.
International Trade and and International Cooperation are having their
portfolios merged with the Department of Foreign Affairs. The
Department of National Revenue and all of its associated agencies will
be put under the control of the Ministry of Finance."

"Is it wise to have a department shakeup immediately into our
mandate?" asked one Minister. MacIntyre nodded.

"I am under the opinion that we should get right down to business, and
pursue our most important, and difficult, objectives first. That gives
us more time to accomplish them. International Trade and Cooperation
were ineffective as virtually all foreign matters were handled through
the DFA anyway, meaning their existence was just an extra mile of red
tape. The only real purpose the Department of National Revenue had was
to oversee its sole organ, the Canadian Revenue Agency. The CRA
operates so independently and self-sufficiently that the Department
isn't really needed. Again, just more red tape. Transferring its
control to the Department of Finance cuts down on bureaucratic
workload."

The gathered ministers shrugged, nodded and otherwise let the issue
slide without much trouble. Maybe if there actually were ministers of
International Trade, Cooperation or National Revenue then they might
object, but as cabinet composition was totally and completely under
the control of the PM, they had never been appointed to begin with.

"Okay, moving on to the next item."

---

Actions:
1)	Introduce the new Prime Minister of Canada, R. Leon MacIntyre
2)      Dissolve the Departments of International Trade and
International Cooperation, merge them with the Department of Foreign
Affairs.
3)      Dissolve the Department of National Revenue and put its sole
agency, the Canadian Revenue Agency, under the control of the
Department of Finance.
4)      Adopt a policy of bureaucratic efficiency and government waste
elimination.